Classical Heroes for Bush

An interesting exercise proposed by N.Z. Bear here:

Campaigning from fiction:


Henry V:

Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more;
Or close the wall up with our English dead.
In peace there's nothing so becomes a man
As modest stillness and humility:
But when the blast of war blows in our ears,
Then imitate the action of the tiger;

Vote for Bush

Stiffen the sinews, summon up the blood,
Disguise fair nature with hard-favour'd rage;
Then lend the eye a terrible aspect;
Let pry through the portage of the head
Like the brass cannon; let the brow o'erwhelm it
As fearfully as doth a galled rock
O'erhang and jutty his confounded base,
Swill'd with the wild and wasteful ocean.
Now set the teeth and stretch the nostril wide,

Vote for Bush

Henry II

Will no one rid me of this turbulent Senator? Vote for Bush!




Jupiter (adapted from the Iliad book five:

The sire of gods and men smiled, and called golden Edwards to his side. "My child," said he, "it has not been given you to be a warrior. Attend, henceforth, to your own delightful matrimonial duties, and leave all this governing to Dubya and to the GOP. Vote for Bush"

Eomer of the Rohirrim, Lord of the Mark:

Vote! Vote! Ride to ruin and the world's ending. Vote for Bush!

And with that the host began to move. But the GOP sang no more. Vote they cried with one voice loud and terrible, and gathering speed like a great tide their battle swept about their fallen and passed, roaring away southwards

adapted from Return of the King JRR Tolkien

More to come.... (this is great fun)